Raise Your Words

"In my opinion..." "I think..."

Both of these are popular phrases on social media today, especially when talking about issues present in our society. Recently, it seems that things are becoming more and more controversial. People are speaking their minds about issues that bother them - which is fantastic! However, a lot of people lose credibility with their opinions, sometimes with what directly follows those "I think"s, and a lot more with how they respond to other people's opinions.

One of my biggest pet peeves probably has to be when someone makes a decision on how they view something without really researching it and forming a factual, thought out opinion. All over my twitter feed I see posts from my peers about issues going on without any research, or possibly even worse, one source and no others. If I've learned anything in the past few years, it's that if you have a solid opinion, people will respect you more and you may even be able to change people's minds.

Seeing all of the fights on Facebook makes me think of an activity I learned this past semester of college. It was presented to me a couple of different times, with maybe an alteration here or there to fit the situation, but the premise went like this; We would be split into either pairs, or depending on the number a group of three, and then a (usually) controversial statement or question was brought to our attention. Usually, we were paired with someone that did not have the same view point as our own. Instead of arguing about our points, we were both then given a controlled amount of time to inform the other person on what we thought. If you were the one not speaking at the time, you only had one goal; listen. In one activity I did like this, right after one person gave their opinion on the issue, the other person who was listening was to repeat what information they were just given to clarify that they understood the other person's viewpoint. Only then could said person go on to share their own view point, and the first person did the same as before; listened and then repeated. After all this happened, then the two could discuss, not argue, about their views and the differences.

The whole point of this activity was to get us to listen to one another. The main problem I see in today's age, be it in a classroom or a courtroom, is that each side is worried too much about arguing their point of view instead of learning what it is that the other side thinks. When this happens, often people get too caught up in the heat of the moment, make weaker arguments, and more than likely offend each other.

From my personal experience, learning to listen helped me greatly. I was able to make friends and have intelligent conversations about opposing view points without getting upset or angry, all because we sat down and listened to each other and instead of focusing on winning, focused on learning. This changed my mind on certain issues, and also helped me get my viewpoint across to other people as well. Sometimes we would still disagree, but we left the conversation having more knowledge and understanding of what it really is that the other person believes.

In one of the instances I was given this activity, I was paired with a friend who had a different view on same-sex marriage than I do. Both of us had facts behind our opinions, and despite our different opinions, we surprisingly found an abundance of similarities in what we thought and how we formed our opinions. Because we were both listening to each other, we were able to really understand each other, and this opened us up to even more conversation. This is something I wish more people would do, because when you get mad and argue, especially on social media, all you do is push people away from other view points and close yourself off from bettering yourself, and bettering society.

So, next time that you really want to get an opinion across when you see or hear something you don't agree with, just listen, or in the case of social media, read into it. Don't just read it and respond. Actually look into the issue, find factual sources (not just one source either. News sites/stations are probably some of the most biased sources you can get). And most of all, stay calm, because you change people's minds with love, not hate.

"Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder." - Rumi

Reason for the Season

It’s everyones, or atleast my, favorite time of year again. December! A month packed full of good vibes and gift giving, particularly caused by the abundance of holidays that fall between the end of November and beginning of January, the most celebrated of those being Christmas. Personally, I love this time of year as I find it a stressful time for most, giving the perfect opportunity to show people around you how much you care about them and show them that they are loved. That is the ‘reason for the season’, right?

Lately, I’ve witness a good amount of hate towards the phrase “Happy Holidays” vs “Merry Christmas”. I, personally, don’t understand the malice, but I decided to dig deeper into why people are frustrated with this inclusive phrase. From what I could gather, many people feel that wishing someone “Happy Holidays” is an attempt to wipe away “Merry Christmas” from the map, and a further attack on the Christian religion in attempts to be more “politically correct”.

This sparked my curiosity even more, so I set to researching. What better place to start than the origins of Christmas itself? The origins of Christmas are not Christian, but Pagan. Before Christianity was the predominant religion in Rome, the month of December was used to celebrate Saturnalia. Saturnalia was a time of rejoicing that began around December 7th and lasted all the way until December 25th. The city took on a carnival type atmosphere, filled with sacrifices at temples, big public banquets, and gift giving. Even the slaves were able to partake in the huge feasts and parties. Many of our Christmas traditions today originated from these same Pagan festivals!

Fast-forward to the 4th century and you find the first adaptation of to the holiday we know as Christmas. Now, the dominant religion of the Roman Empire was Christianity. Instead of throwing this time of celebration away, it was adapted to fit the birth of Christ. It’s this adaptation that we have to thank for the holiday now celebrated in our present day.

Now, we celebrate Christmas in many different ways. Children wait patiently in their beds for Santa to bring them presents. Stockings are hung over the fireplace - or rather, wherever that can be hung in the household - and houses are decked with Christmas lights and inflatable Santa’s and possibly a trusty Rudolph to make the scene complete. Neighbors call out “Merry Chistmas” to each other, or, as I mentioned before, “Happy Holidays”.

This leads to the next part of my research; where did these phrases come from? “Merry Christmas”  dates back to the early 1600’s, where it was quoted “"And thus I comytt you to god, who send you a mery Christmas & many." in The Hereford Municipal Manuscript. However, it was not made the popular greeting until the 1840’s when it was a published phrase in Charles Dickens’ Christmas Carol. Not even 50 years later we begin to see our second phrase “Happy Holidays” reer up and ultimately become popular in the 1970’s. This phrase was created not to exclude Christmas, but rather to include the many other holidays celebrated in the joyous time. These holidays include: Thanksgiving, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, the Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary, The Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, the Winter solstice, Christmas, Boxing Day, The New Year, and concluding with Epiphany.

Now that I had the facts of what I was talking about, I felt more comfortable picking a side on the controversy between wishing someone “Merry Christmas” and “Happy Holidays”. The way I see it, wishing someone “Happy Holidays” is a way to make sure all of the holidays in this general time are celebrated and making sure that people know you care about their wellbeing in this crazy time of year. But as I mentioned before, many people see this as an attempt to wipe out Christmas and diminish the Christian faith.

Now, call me crazy, but I do not agree with this logic. First, there is the fact that Christmas by definition is included in the phrase “Happy Holidays”. Second, by completely ignoring the fact that there are other holidays around us celebrated by people brought up in different cultures. In my philosophy class this semester, we talked about a section of ethics referred to as “Cultural Imperialism”. This is the term used for when larger societies/cultures look down upon smaller ones, deny their values, and force their own upon said smaller groups. This is what the phrase “Happy Holidays” was created to accomplish in the first place. Here in America, we are proudly dubbed “The Land of the Free”. Last time I checked that means that everyone here is free to celebrate their own holidays during the year, especially around this time.

Christmas is obviously the more prominent of the holidays. While it is not as centered on the celebration of Christ’s birth as before, it is still the most largely celebrated. When the phrase “Happy Holidays” is completely ignored, you are ignoring the fact that there are different people and different holidays out there besides your own, completely going against the values that America was founded on.

Now, one argument I’ve heard about this is that we are nation founded on Christian beliefs, so they should be the more prominent. That is completely evident in society by the fact that you can find a church in essentially every town of America if you look for it. Unfortunately, some of these are not spreading true Christian values, but the fact remains that Christianity is the most popular religion in our nation.

The second argument is that by not wishing someone “Merry Christmas” and instead using “Happy Holidays” we are taking Christ out of the season of celebration. As a young man brought up in Christian values, I first must say if you are so worried about your own views coming across by a simple greeting then you must not be living your life the right way. What I like to do in this situation is bring up the question; What would Jesus do? I firmly stand by my belief that Jesus himself would wish someone Happy Holidays. As Christians, it is a duty to spread love to anyone whom you can. While they may not celebrate the same holiday as you, isn’t it so heartwarming to know that someone out there is wishing you well in the time where people are too obsessed with spending money to spreading love around to their community? Love thy neighbor, no matter what holiday they celebrate.

The truth is, we live in a world where people are so focused on the gift giving, and arguing about what phrase should be most popular in the media and on greeting cards that we completely fall away from the true values that all of these holidays encompass: Spreading love to those around us, and having a time of year where no matter what day it actually is, we can sit back and reflect on all the good we have been blessed with this year. Over the past view years, charity givings have decreased. Children, adults, other human beings are out on the streets while we sit on our bums, more focused on the fact that our views are being “attacked”. Instead of being so focused on the greetings, why don't we take the same energy to focus on volunteering at a homeless shelter during this year, or going through all of our old things to see if there is a coat or blanket we can donate to help make this time of year easier on one who is not having as blessed a season as we are? That way, we truly are keeping Christ in Christmas by living our lives like he would want us to.

Now, I feel as if I’m begging to digress from my original point. That being; Do not get angry when people wish you “Happy Holidays”. Instead, take hold of this opportunity to spread to love and cheer that are supposed to be the true embodiment of Christmas around, and wish them Happy Holidays right back. You can even add your own holiday to it “Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays” has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?

Sources:

wikipedia.com

carm.org

simpletoremember.com

phrases.org.uk